DRINKING WATER: So I've been drinking ALOT of water all this week and last week; around five or more bottles a day. So here's a list of things I've learned. 1) It's easier than you think. I am now craving water! I am constantly refilling my water bottle! I drink a bottle getting dressed in the morning, on the way to work, several at work, one on the way home, and several at home in the evenings. I just can't seem to get enough of it now. 2) I feel healthier. Yeah, yeah, expected huh? I really do feel a lot better. AMAZING 3) My tummy isn't big. It looks amazing! Plus, it feels better too! I'm getting a summer body without even trying! Nothing has changed exercise wise. I'm still a semi-active couch potatoe! 4) Everything tastes great! My taste buds seem like they have been restarted and super charged! I now have a new found appreciation for all the different flavors. Which leads into my next discovery... 5) Eating habits have changed. I'm not craving junk food. I know that sounds so weird. That's not to say I don't crave something sweet or some chocolate but overly processed food now tastes like garbage! I am always wanting some fruit! 6) Domino Effect It's been a domino effect with the choices I make everyday. Since I'm now "drinking" healthy it makes me want to live a healthy lifestyle. It covers everything! I'll be sure to write a post about all the changes I'm making! I have to step away from the computer but I hope you have enjoyed this post or even thought about making a healthier lifestyle change for yourself!!

Got to work SUPER DUPER early this morning. I don't have to be here until 9 and I'm here at seven thirty but oh well. But I swear church's chicken will be the death of me!!! I need to stop eating it and any other fast foods! I should really only start eating at home. I woke up this morning feeling bloated and fat no doubt from the church's and big lunch yesterday. I went full fat ass mode all day yesterday which is pathetic. I also forgot to wear my wait trimmer today. I'd probably run off and forget my head if it wasn't attached to my body, such is my life. I also really need to get my spending under control while I'm working on my middle. There is no reason for me to be spending $50 a day on bullshit when I'm used to surviving on $50 a week or less! I just need to pull myself together. Just getting my eyebrows done, but I NEED that. They look rough as hell and just disgusting! i am however very proud of myself for waking up early, getting a nice bath, and looking fabulous today!!! But on another happy note my love life is going really damn swell. Haven;t been this happy in a while, not just relationship wise but with myself as a whole in general. Which is AHHHMAZING! KATIE START USING MFP RELIGIOUSLY AGAIN! Also, for any of my readers that use my fitness pal you can send me a friend invite on there to keep up with me to katiebweann (just say your from my blog)!

I'm sitting here in bed realizing I haven't written in my journal thats been wedged between my matress for quite sometime now; so I figured why not just make it digital. This is going to be basically about everything now. Mainly centered on weightloss and whatever I really want. So I have a goal to lose 20lbs by August and I know I can do it. To lose the wieght all I have to do is be self motivated, responsible, and determined. I've done it before and I can do it again. I'm tired of the yoyoing I want to look great for myself and my significant other. There's no sense in me being a fat lard all my youth! So how am I going to do this? First let's say I weigh 140lbs. That's what the scale at the doctor said nayway the other day. So here's a few things I'm going to do to accomplish my goal. 1. Buy a scale. 2. Only drink water. 3. Exercise EVERYDAY. 4. Always wear my waist trimmer to work. 5. Nothing but vegetables until August or just stay vegetarian. 6. Keep a clean house. Less clutter means more time to focus on you. 7. Giving up is not an option.EVER. 8. Crunches Crunches Crunches 9. Stay positive. 10. Be the skinny friend. 11. What you do today will effect your tommorrow. 12. Just because someone else is eating it doesn;t mean you have too. 13. A minute on the lips, a lifetime on the hips. 14. Nothing tastes or feels as wonderful as skinny. 15. Do it for the pencil legs this winter with your boots and leggings. 16. DO IT FOR YOU I just want to be back how I used to be light and happy and healthy. I am over weight and there is absolutly no sense in it at all. I'm just a lazy fat ass right meow and there is no reason. Well I know the reason all the shit food I've been gorging myself on like a pig getting ready for market which is pathetic. Another thing...If whoever you are is reading this, if anyone is...please if you don;t have anything nice to say don;t say anything at all. Yes I;m being selfish becasue this is my blog.. I just want to come here and vent and not be judged. Well out it this way if you're judging keep it to yourself atleast your getting some sort of entertainment out of me. And to think I was going to sale my Mac Air. This baby is about to become the epicenter of my weight loss. My little electronic compilation of everything personal... I'm a doodler and list freak so this would be the best way for me to do it instead of the gross and thousands of papers I have cluttering my purse and office and home. This will be much more simple. Talking about simple; it's time to down size lots of things in my life not jsut myself. The clutter in my home is maddening. I can sell so much stuff.... My little house is filled to the brim with Bullshit upon bull shit. My room is covered in clothing, so is my bathroom,spare bedroom, laundry room, closet, and various other places in the house. I literally have way to many clothes some are 10 years or older and omse still have the tags on them from god knows when. But, I'll get it done. And I just realized something my ass needs to wuit fucking procrastinating. I swear if I was making a tenth of a cent everytime I do so I'd be a multi billionaire in wway less than a year. My mind is racing right now and I could literally type all night and never sleep but I have work tommorow so I really need to go to sleep. This is when I wish I wasn;t working but I do love my money. I could sit at home allllll day typing away and reading that junk you can find at the far out ends of the internet world that sometimes are borderline bizarre......

I realize every time I plan to fast. It fails. When I don't plan or think about food I don't eat all day.

That was my weight when I hopped on the scale this morning! Making progress! Today I'm starting a crawfish boil diet. A cup of crawfish a day. 1/2 a potatoe, & a couple bites of corn. Gonna just go with this little diet until my crawfish is all gone. I peeled 5lbs of it today. The tails filled up a 4-5cup measuring cup. So this is gonna last for about 4 days. I'm only allowing myself ketchup/mayo to dip them in; I have already pre-made a mixture of it. It makes my tummy really tingly and hot so they are kinda hard to keep down. Like I just want to go vomit right now. They taste so yummy but make my tummy burn:( 

Well I haven't gained or lost any weight after fasting for 24hrs then I had a binge. I felt guilty and purged. The only thing I haven't purged today is little potatoe I ate to calm my tummy after purging crawfish. I fell pretty shitty. Chugging my 2L of water first thing in the morning. & laxing. Or maybe a water pill. Actually probably going to fast for as long as I can. When it feels like I can't go anymore gonna chug a 2L then pop a water pill & see how much that motivates me to keep going. I just want to get this nasty weight off. Water weight or not. I want to know how much my actual body weighs. I need to weigh at most 125. 115 would be perfection right now for me.  Just gotta get on my workout grind this week. Even if I'm fasting a yoga class never killed any one. I may go for a swim if I complete 4 days of fasting or atleast lay out by the pool to feel the wonderful sunshine. I just need to get another body wrap. Those things work wonder. Just the plain $8 golds gym waist trimmer from walmart. Worked like a charm last time! I also need to invest in some good thermogenic pills. I know the winning combo I just have to use it. Fasting with vitamins & weightloss supplements. I mean my lord it's not that hard; why am I making it seem like it is. I need to grow some balls, get my panties out a wad, quit bitching, & just DO THW DAMN THING!! 

I'm very upset by the fact that I've laxed (lost 3-4lbs) which is good. But, I've been fasting 24hours now & haven't lost anything. I'm getting pretty upset & just want to binge on a hamburger patty with ketchup... This has never happened to me. Maybe I should crack open the water pills in the morning if I'm still at 140. Like why is this happening to me. I just want to be in the 120's before my bae got home. FML. Once I get there I will never let myself go again. This is just terrible. I hate being FAT. I want to say it's so not fair but I know it is. I let myself get this way.